Top Ten Signs your Medicine Man is a Scam Artist

10. He tries to sell you your own personal mile of the Red Road.
9. You begin to suspect his traditional herbal medicine is really just crushed up Tylenol from IHS.
8. His Sundance is sponsored by Frito-Lay.
7. Suddenly, all his ceremonies seem real familiar after you watch the movie "Billy Jack" again.
6. The only tribal nation he is affiliated with is Donation.
5. Rich ladies from California are convinced he needs a different colored 1999 4x4 truck for each of the 4 directions.
4. Not only does he have a website, but the address is www.sellout.com.
3. The only thing in his pipebag is a portable credit card machine.
2. In order to attend one of his sweats, you need to contact Ticketmaster first.
1. His sacred white buffalo reeks of spray paint